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Comedy Zone :: Quotes from the British and American Sitcoms
Have you seen Spaced, Red Dwarf, It Crowd, Office, Green Wing, Peep Show, Futurama, Family Guy, Friends, Seinfeld, Will and Grace...? Do you think they are funny? Can you quote them? Then come and join us! Oh, and by the way, in English, please!


Disclaimer: We do not know where to get any of these titles nor subtitles nor anything else. So do not ask! (Unless you are fond of bananas and we have loads and loads of bananas indeed)

Máte k tomu co říct? Vložte se do diskuze.
CANEBRA --- 16:32:33 20.6.2012
sorry, not sitcom, but priceless :D

The Dictator, 2012:

General Aladeen:
"You go to the bathroom after Osama, you will realize the true meaning of terrorism."

"Kim Kardashian is a very nice girl, but unbelievably hairy! When I pulled her panties down, I thought I was looking in the mirror."

"I love it when women go to school. It's like seeing a monkey on roller skates -- it means nothing to them, but it's so adorable for us."

Store Customer: "God, the police are such fascist bastards."
Aladeen: "Yes, and not even in a good way."
CANEBRA --- 16:21:22 20.6.2012
2 Broke Girls, s01e15

Caroline: [After noticing Max is smoking one of Sophie's electric cigarettes] Max, you shouldn't smoke. You'll get...
Max: What, electrocuted? This is silly. If I'm gonna suck on something this hard and get no pleasure out of it, I should just date.
ALEEGALTROLL --- 11:40:08 17.11.2011
"The point I'm trying to make, you dirty son of a fetid whoremonger's bitch, is that we're friends!" - Rimmer
JNK --- 18:07:51 5.10.2011
Siren ep 1
She calls it post-traumatic disorder, I call it up, horny down.
911 --- 13:30:33 23.5.2011
Judge Harm: Bart Simpson, I declare you emancipated. Further, I hereby garnish Homer's wages until Bart is fully repaid.
Homer: Mmmm.. Garnish.
FALLENANGEL --- 21:27:18 18.5.2011
"Hi, Earl!"
PAVLOS --- 1:21:39 21.12.2010
Sheldon: 'I'm not insane, my mother had me tested.'

(Big Bang Theory:)
ELAINE --- 22:03:22 9.12.2010
Manny: "ooh, ooh, ooh"
Bernard: "what's up with you?"
Manny: "I get terrible cramp when I'm stressed"
Bernard: "So don't be stressed. Why are you stressed?"
Manny: "Because I open the fridge door there are shin bandages next to the cheese."
Bernard: "That's just a little..."
Manny: "There's jam in the bath"
Bernard: "Oh, come on!"
Manny: "You are a filth wizard, a friend only to the pig and the rat"
(Manny's opening a pizza box) Ugh. Look!"
Bernard: "Pizza. I was gonna warm and eat it later. Everybody does that. That's normal. You are looking for things to complain about!"
Manny: (showing him the box) "And what are these?"
Bernard: "Wasps"

(Black Books, Grapes of Wrath)

FALLENANGEL --- 22:13:25 6.10.2010
"Oh, we have been voting. Three of us voted for the plane, Sheldon voted for the train... so we are taking the train."
??? --- 10:22:57 15.9.2010
Nice suit. John Phillips, London. I have two myself. Rumor has it Arafat buys his there.