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Waste lands - the dust falling on the reality
All the particles flowing around, forming various
substances, forming various objects, forming various
people, forming various ideas, forming various civilizations,
forming various worlds..

As an essential part of this cycle, there is one
rare particle, which human can't live without. The
particle of inspiration. May one hit you here! And
may you share yourself with others here..

So, as it is written - On the eigth day, God started debugging:
Máte k tomu co říct? Vložte se do diskuze.
PASKY --- 1:02:07 14.5.2013
C++ has its place in the history of programming languages. Just as Caligula has his place in the history of the Roman Empire.

In My Egotistical Opinion, most people's C programs should be indented six feet downward and covered with dirt.

There are only two things wrong with C++: The initial concept and the implementation.

If Java had true garbage collection, most programs would delete themselves upon execution.
PASKY --- 1:01:40 14.5.2013
When my daughter was about seven years old, she asked me one day what I did at work. I told her I worked at the college - that my job was to teach people how to draw. She stared at me, incredulous, and said, "You mean they forget?"
-- Howard Ikemoto

"People have now-a-days got a strange opinion that everything should be taught by lectures. Now, I cannot see that lectures can do so much as reading
the books from which the lectures are taken. I know nothing that can be best taught by lectures, except where experiments are to be shewn. You may teach chemistry by lectures -- You might teach the making of shoes by lectures!"
-- Samuel Johnson, quote from Life of Johnson (1791).

Always give a person as much rope as possible. This is so when you do pull the lever, he swings real good.
-- S. Short

Sometimes people walk away because they want to be alone. And sometimes they
walk away because they want to know if you care enough to follow them into hell
-- M. Garibaldi, Babylon 5

English does not borrow from other languages. English follows other languages
down dark alleys, hits them over the head, and rifles through their pockets for
loose grammar.

If the fool would persist in his folly he would become wise.
-- William Blake

In Soviet Russia, government controls the commerce.
PASKY --- 0:59:47 14.5.2013
The Space Shuttle and the Horse's Rear End

Say friend, did you know that the US Standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 feet, 8 1/2 inches.

That's an exceedingly odd number. Why was that gauge used?

Because that's the way they built them in England, and the US railroads were built by English expatriates.

I see, but why did the English build them like that?

Because the first railway lines were built by the same people who built the pre-railroad tramways, and that's the gauge they used.

Well, why did they use that gauge in England?

Because the people who built the tramways used the same jigs and tools that they used for building wagons, which used that wheel spacing.

Okay! Why did their wagons use that odd wheel spacing?

Because, if they tried to use any other spacing the wagon wheels would break on some of the old, long distance roads. Because that's the spacing of the old wheel ruts.

So who built these old rutted roads?

The first long distance roads in Europe were built by Imperial Rome for the benefit of their legions. The Roman roads have been used ever since.

And the ruts?

The original ruts, which everyone else had to match for fear of destroying their wagons, were first made by the wheels of Roman war chariots. Since the chariots were made for or by Imperial Rome they were all alike in the matter of wheel spacing.

Thus, we have the answer to the original question. The United States standard railroad gauge of 4 feet, 8 1/2 inches derives from the original specification for an Imperial Roman army war chariot.

And the motto of the story is Specifications and bureaucracies live forever.

So, the next time you are handed a specification and wonder what horse's ass came up with it, you may be exactly right. Because the Imperial Roman chariots were made to be just wide enough to accommodate the back-ends of two war-horses.

So, just what does this have to do with the exploration of space?

Well, there's an interesting extension of the story about railroad gauge and horses' behinds. When we see a Space Shuttle sitting on the launch pad, there are two big booster rockets attached to the sides of the main fuel tank. These are the solid rocket boosters, or SRBs. The SRBs are made by Thiokol at a factory in Utah. The engineers who designed the SRBs might have preferred to make them a bit fatter, but the SRBs had to be shipped by train from the factory to the launch site.

The railroad from the factory runs through a tunnel in the mountains. The SRBs had to fit through that tunnel. The tunnel is slightly wider than a railroad track, and the railroad track is about as wide as two horses' behinds.

So a major design feature of what is arguably the world's most advanced transportation system was originally determined by the width of a horse's ass.
PASKY --- 4:17:52 20.9.2007
Dr. Sierpinski stepped back from the operating table to admire his handy-work. The stitching was complete, a meticulous and expertly done job.
The electrodes were in place, and only administering the life giving elixir remained. Soon his work would be done, soon the world would see!

"Igor!" he yelled, "Raise the table into position so we may begin the final stage!" His trusty yet somewhat dimwitted hunchback assistant
complied, and slowly turned the crank that moved the operating table into a vertical position.

The creature would stand seven feet tall and was stronger than an ox. His heart and lungs twice that of a normal man's allowing him to carry his
massive size as if he were a sprinter. Lifting a cart above his head would be no difficult feat, and his advanced nervous system made him
impervious to the jabs and barbs only his future profession could dish out.

His physical prowess was outmatched only by his mental faculties. Dr. Sierpinski had spent years designing and building the biomechanic wonder
(some would call monstrosity) that sat inside the creature's over sized skull. In it he had placed the knowledge and experience of all the worlds
greats - Igor had been most helpful at gathering the necessary remains, scouring the globe and riding coach to boot. Burns, Marx, Pryor - almost
every comedian who'd ever gotten a laugh was represented in the devilish clockwork of the creatures mind. Here truly would be someone that would
show the world. Dr. Abraham "Giggles" Sierpinski would be laughed at no more...yes, truly, his creature...would be laughed _with_!

The table clicked into place with a final clash. Far above the castle's dungeon laboratory thunder cracked from the approaching storm. "Now Igor,
Now! Quickly, throw the switch!" Igor shuffled to the table and pulled the lever. A bright flash erupted as lighting struck the castle's tower
and traveled through a series of wires to the creatures base.


The lighting subsided, and the laboratory was suddenly quiet. The doctor held his breath. Quietly, almost a murmur escaped from the creatures


"He speaks Igor, he speaks! Quickly! Release the straps! My creature, tell me, what are you trying to say?"

"...mmmmrrchhc.......bsod....mrrrrrghhh.......mmmm rrrrg....Microsoft.....Mrrrrgh...Microsoft has announced that it is partnering with a Japanese
automaker to incorporate Windows Vista Auto Edition with all of their car systems."


"mrrrgh...mrrrrrrgh....In other news, family of 4 dies as their Japanese car careens off of a cliff after experiencing a BSOD in their Microsoft
Windows Vista Auto Edition software."

Igor helpfully chimed in with a boom-tsk from his laboratory drum set.

"WHAT! What was that? That...that...that wasn't even funny! How...how could this be? My creature, the reanimated flesh of dead humor itself...its
not even funny!" He sank to the ground in despair. "How...how could I have been so wrong! Where did I fail? Where did I fail?"

The creature lifted its massive head, "I for one welcome...mrrrrgh...I for one welcome our failed humor overlord....ggggggahhahghg"

Dr. Sierpinksi ran from the laboratory, from his monster, clawing his eyes and hair, and wailing into the depths of the night.
PASKY --- 4:17:22 20.9.2007
While the engineer developed his thesis, the director leaned over to
his assistant and whispered, "Did you ever hear of why the sea is salt?"
"Why the sea is salt?" whispered back the assistant. "What do you
The director continued: "When I was a little kid, I heard the story of
`Why the sea is salt' many times, but I never thought it important until just
a moment ago. It's something like this: Formerly the sea was fresh water and
salt was rare and expensive. A miller received from a wizard a wonderful
machine that just ground salt out of itself all day long. At first the miller
thought himself the most fortunate man in the world, but soon all the villages
had salt to last them for centuries and still the machine kept on grinding
more salt. The miller had to move out of his house, he had to move off his
acres. At last he determined that he would sink the machine in the sea and
be rid of it. But the mill ground so fast that boat and miller and machine
were sunk together, and down below, the mill still went on grinding and that's
why the sea is salt."
"I don't get you," said the assistant.
-- Guy Endore, "Men of Iron"
PASKY --- 4:16:50 20.9.2007
Early to rise and early to bed makes a male healthy and wealthy and dead.
-- James Thurber

If the radiance of a thousand suns were to burst at once into the sky, that
would be like the splendor of the Mighty One... I am become Death, the
Shatterer of Worlds.
-- J. Robert Oppenheimer, quoting The Bhagavad Gita

There was a devout nun in the XVth century,
who decided to make a pilgrimage to Jerusalem.
But she belonged to an order that wore bags over their heads.
And the mother superior told the nun
that if she walked through the countryside with a bag on her head,
she would scare people.
But the nun insisted,
so the mother superior allowed to her to walk around and around the cloister,
every day
for three years
until she covered the equivalent distance to the Holy City.
At the end of her journey
the nun was so exhausted that she collapsed.
A doctor was called.
After examining her he announced that she was too weak to make the return trip.
The nun died shortly after.

Projekt National Missile Defense (NMD) je budován pro obranu USA před útokem
mezikontinentálních balistických raket (anglicky Intercontinental Ballistic
Missiles - ICBM). Tyto rakety představují pomyslný vrchol toho, co člověk
vyvinul v neustálé snaze o zničení sebe sama jako druhu. Dnešní ICBM dokáží po
svém odpálení z podzemního sila, pohyblivé rampy či ponorky obletět polovinu
zeměkoule a ve vesmírném vzduchoprázdnu vypustit svůj smrtelný náklad, který
může čítat i deset samostatně naváděných hlavic, z nichž každá může, v případě
použití jaderné náplně, zničit větší město.
-- Jan Vurbs, blog.respekt.cz

Spočítej si, jaké Boží dary jsi dostal, a nech svého souseda, ať v klidu spočítá své.
-- James Thurber

Ever try. Ever fail. No matter.
Try again. Fail again. Fail better.
-- Samuel Beckett

"You would do well not to imagine profundity," he said. "Anything that seems
of momentous occasion should be dwelt upon as though it were of slight note.
Conversely, trivialities must be attended to with the greatest of care.
Because death is momentous, give it no thought; because victory is important,
give it no thought; because the method of achievement and discovery is less
momentous than the effect, dwell always upon the method. You will strengthen
yourself in this way."
-- Jessica Salmonson, "The Swordswoman"

Romance is dead. It was acquired in a hostile takeover by Hallmark and Disney,
homogenized, and sold off piece by piece. -- Lisa Simpson
ISTEVE --- 23:05:06 27.11.2006
"There was a young lady from Niger1
Who went for a ride on a tiger
They returned from the ride
With the lady inside
And a smile on the face of the tiger."

1ev. 'Riga', ale Niger se mi libi vic;)
ISTEVE --- 10:29:49 26.11.2006
Consider for instance some comfortable English professor defending Russian totalitarianism. He cannot say outright, "I believe in killing off your opponents when you can get good results by doing so." Probably, therefore, he will say something like this:

"While freely conceding that the Soviet regime exhibits certain features which the humanitarian may be inclined to deplore, we must, I think, agree that a certain curtailment of the right to political opposition is an unavoidable concomitant of transitional periods, and that the rigors which the Russian people have been called upon to undergo have been amply justified in the sphere of concrete achievement."

-- George Orwell, Politics and the English Language
PASKY --- 21:26:19 25.11.2006
Nejvíce ze všech se mi líbili dva hoši, kteří nesli na tyčích prázdný průhledný igelit bez jakéhokoli znaku. Opravdu, to mi připadalo jako naprosto nejvýstižnější politické heslo dneška. -- Klub #726
PASKY --- 21:18:56 25.11.2006
A witty saying proves nothing. -- Voltaire
Bullshit! Witty sayings are the very essence of wisdom, and I should know. -- Oscar Wilde

Alan Stanowski, masér a frontman kapely Igor, se svěřil CB s nevšedním zážitkem
s uruguayskou kuchyní: "Byla to malá řežba na pláži - normálně jsme s kámošema
točili takovej malej videoartík, když se z lesa u beachu vyvalila fakt mega
vlna ovesný kaše. Nejdřív jsem to moc nechytal, ale pak mi to celý vysvětlili.
Červený pandy v pralese kradou domorodcům voves. Snědí ho a pak se jdou jako
obvykle vyválet do horkýho bahna na úpatí sopky Xiloxualio. Jenže je tu mini
hák - oves působí na jejich nervosexuální centra v mozku, takže se samci pand
naparujou před roštěnkama vo dost dýl než normoš. Kombinace ovesný kaše a teplý
vody neudělá moc mega cool jejich střevům, takže jednoduše vybuchnou. Obvykle
je v jedný lázni >300 pand, což je dohro asi šestnáct tisíc litrů kaše. Jediný,
co jsem nechyt, byla namodralá barva kaše, ale byl jsem zaučenej, že to
způsobujou ty pandí velikánský roztomilý vočíčka - sklivec těhle sudoústejch
ptakořitnejch savců je laděnej do modra.